baby rejecting mom after going back to work

I can understand that your sons behavior is making you sad. And do things together all of you. You ask about the girl not wanting to talk to mom on the phone. Your baby will not feel abandoned by you when you return to work. Is my life set for me, and I meant to be rejected by everyone. However, based on that you say your wife is concerned that your daughter doesnt like her anymore, it makes me believe that this situation has not been going on since she was an infant. Now at 10 months old, she treated me with the same fondness and love that she had showed my husband during her early months. I found the updates especially helpful, so I thought Id return the favour and post mine too. I think there are two things you should do. If anything, it will harm the situation more. I wake him up with a bottle in the morning and put him to bed with a massage and kisses and rocking at night. To make them as comfortable as possible with you, have you tried recording lullabies or small stories that they can listen to when you are not around? I thought my daughter was the only one to behave this way. He will be picked up and carried around for the smallest incident. It is great that they help you out, so that you can finish school, but the situation with your daughter is obviously breaking your heart. She would be able to go years without knowing anything about us. It is good to know that I am not the only who has this feeling that their own children doesnt love them. Im going back to work next month so I started bottle fed baby at 2.5 mo 3 weeks ago. I come from work and he doesnt care if I am there I feel horrible because if my sister comes he gets so so happy and he crawls so fast to her and he wants her to carry him I get so sad but I keep it inside until tonight I just couldnt I cried and thought does he not love me? Above all, enjoy these last few weeks with your little one. First of all, kudos to you who co-sleep with your daughter! Of course we can go the road of power struggles, but it wont help. My mom stayed with me for the first four months to help me out. Its putting a lot of strain on our relationship. I just persevered like you, and it really did get better. Ask your employer if something like this is an option. The child speaks to everyone on the phone but once she hears its her mother she goes hysterical. My son is 9 months old and , Ive always taken care of him feed, everything he needs Ive been by his side since we left the hospital, now that I moved to another state he doesnt call me momma anymore he calls it to his grandma he just doesnt seem to need me anymore . Im teaching and comes back home in the early evening. Seems it starts around this age. Create boundaries and routines that support ample family and . I play with him, Ive teacher him words in (Greek) we read books everything!!! Please take care. Maybe cuddle up the three of you in her bed for a little story or lullaby? Paula. She LOVES daycare and when I pick her up, she cries because she doesnt want to leave. If she wants help then she should take her to day care then then she will start to understand the women picking her up is her mother. It did not used to be this way she used to be very attached to me. She still prefers other people and doesnt seem to care for any of her own kin.not even her sister or brother, uncles, etc. Right now, all she really needs is love, skin contact and food. Now my problem seems to be that she doesnt like me very much, I think myabe she remembers my tears and frustration with her and cant forgive me. Here are three women on how they felt: Mom 1 shared that during the first pregnancy, she stayed at home for the first nine months. this week she turned 9 months and she has somehow attached herself to my mom. Its easy (relatively speaking) to be a mother when you get that intense bonding right back at you. My partner thinks I m silly and tells me not to say things like she does not want me but its true, he never worries cause she wants him all the time. Lori Mihalich Levin's book Back to Work After Baby: How to Plan and Navigate a Mindful Return from Maternity Leave, should be required reading for all new mamas. I hope you find a way make this all work out without hate and anger. everyone will try to get him to say it and he just stares blankly at me, he does not want me to hold him, kiss him, or hug him! I have to give her a bath, I have to brush her teeth, I have to feed her, I am the only to play with her and I am the one to read bed time stories. Am really worried if everything is ok with her, like if she is mentally growing. So who knows, within a month, you might be carrying a whining little daughter all day long. Try rocking gently whilst feeding. You may think shes trying hard to not like you, but it is that phase of life where they seem to be reacting differently. If must be terribly hard to be away so much from your family and then come home and not feel welcome. I breastfeed her and I handle 98% of all care for her. Getting the Right Child Care. I take care of her so nicely and to the best of efforts but she doesnt like me. Also she is obsessed with my mother and just ignores me or is mean to me. I have never been away from her for more than 2 hours before this and now she doesnt even care to see me. Jemma. At about 12 months she became very much a mammas girl and now when i leave her to go to work she is loving to my boyfriend when i am gone but when she can see me she seems to hate him. Im a single 18 year old mother who still lives at home with my parents and siblings. I guess i am being silly. Somtimes she seems to get very distressed, but at bedtime I read to her and hold her, my wife says Im the best person to get her to sleep? I have returned to work since and he always cry when I carry him? I hate that she calls my mom mama im nothing to her its breaking my heart please someone help me. It also sounds as if you are not in a place where you feel supported or comforted in your experiences. Its got to a point where I feel like everything is against me. Id say that is completely normal! Maybe you can decide that she goes out a couple of evenings a week, so that you can keep 100% focus on having a good time with your daughter. I am an older mom (41 years old). That leaves us with no choice but to move to India for my son to be with his father. That is not to say that you dont have a real problem. Honestly, I feel like there must be something inherently wrong with me for my own (9 month) baby not to love me as much as my partner. There is a worker at her nursery who she is not keen on and she scratched her yesterday which puts me in the same category as her I guess. And even after that, it is still entirely possible to bond. Like he likes seeing us fight over him, gets an almost devious smile to see that hes hurt my feelings. Here is the background: Ive been dating my boyfriend for over a year but knew him and his daughter since she was 8 months. Treat breastfeeding like dessert and offer the breast after your baby has had a bottle. And with every shared experience and every bit of advice I felt more and more comfort.Thank you so much for making me feel better, restoring my faith in myself as a mom. I thoguht maybe I didnt give her enough love because I was so busy trying to get her into a routine. When he was 4-6 mos, a friend was holding him and he didnt want to come back to me when I asked for him. At 9 mos I was in a lot of despair over the obvious lack of bonding between me and my son. there was even one night where she pushed me away and tried to crawl away when i got near. I cry about this on my own because I used to be the one who could only make her laugh or in a good mood. A wonderful thing to do in periods like this, is to spend time alone with the child. Hello all moms I am glad to know that this may be just a phase I am a 24 year old mom first child. Im assuming this is not the case with you, obviously. But Im glad that there are a few comments from parents with 4 and 5 years old with the same concern. my husband always gets out and travel, but when he gets home, my boys are so excited to see him. I dont want this to have any lasting affects on our long term relationship. It is heart-breaking, what can I do? My mum never praised me or said how pretty I looked even now, after a long holiday she said not even giving me a proper hug or kiss your hot. At least I say to my baby boy that I love him that am proud of him. I loved my baby boy the minute I saw the ultrasound. But doesnt mean that you should just sit and wait! I am prone to mild depression and can be a bit of a hermit sometimes. It has been 37 years and we are not close. Most nursing strikes are over, with the baby back to breastfeeding, within two to four days. I feel left out. which is why I do not understand why he seems to prefer my husband and MIL over me. (Do read the tips in the linked article for safe co-sleeping!) And one afternoon she suddenly started rejecting me. we spend so much time with our babies, i think its natural for them to pick up on our vibe. The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. He will go to Nursery without a second glance and to any family or friend without so much as a look of concern over to me. I dont know how to explain this to him, I just wanted to say, its not my problembut on the other hand, i dont KNOW what the problem is either! This is the age when separation anxiety and stranger anxiety may come in full force. Mom of two and creator of Mindful Return, an e-course and blog for moms heading back to work after baby, this woman knows her subject. Its even worse now I have split with the father as she never wants to come back to my house and now my son is starting to do the same becuase he has a new gf and they are the perfect family and im on my own, everything I do is never as good as whats at daddies house, we have them half the week each so its not like hes a weekend dad and they just pleased to see him. Especially when you have a insane father constantly making complaints and accusations your way just to get the child from you. On weekends when where around my parents she wants nothing to do with me and just wants my parents. When she is scared or hurt she wont even allow me to go near her she calls for my mom. It breaks my heart Ive cried many times!! I am really glad to see that I am not the only one with this problem. she cries alot wen i pick her back from wrk . Weekends too. Give him a bah, feed him, put him to bed, give him his breakfast, get him dressed, take him out in his pram and do not take no for an answer or it will get worse. Mom gets into the bathtub, full of warm (not hot) water with baby. And hug your wife. Even the same morning, she wanted to be with me and when she woke up from her nap, she did not want me around. Our job is then to not take it personally, not reinforce it by showing strong emotions, but simply allow our children to for some reason need one parent more than the other from time to time, It is painful, but it is normal development. My mom used to take care of her during the afternoon so I could study. Try feeding with cool or alternatively warmed milk. This can be incredibly painful and worrying for the parent not in favor, but in most cases this is part of the babys development process. yes its also my in-laws first grand child but at times i feel there are selffish. If it is fairly new maximum 1 year or so what is going on is actually a completely natural development stage in your daughters life. But all this can be easily changed! I was born to an ignorant mother who failed to nurture me. Thank you thank you thank you!! Another aspect is that neither you nor your son seems to be comfortable with the role you have right now. Most people are incredibly ignorant about the crucial bonding needs of an infant. I totally understand that you are thinking about another job, and maybe that isnt such a bad idea over time But until then or if you choose not to, there are a few things you can do. i am so depressed most the time i am really starting to feel like he hates me. what am I to do !! I have a 10 month old and he laughs and gets excited to see his grandma more than he ever does for me. i know i need to love her now but do feel so sad when she pushes away from me. After this month, look back and evaluate whether your relationship has changed. In fact she would scream and cry I will always take her out of her room and try to pacify her. What the hell do you expect when you abandon your baby? Everyone eeps telling me that he loves me and he did miss me but it doesnt feel like it. I feel bad for the child. It sounds to me as if you really want the best for your son, but that you are to some extent in a vicious circle. After all, during their first twelve months babies still physically need mother's milk. Running away like that is completely unacceptable. In my opinion its not a healthy life for her or I. Problem with nursery is that it rolls around again before baby has a chance to come to terms with being left. Daddy is a play toy and thinks he comes and goes and is fun, but deep down I know she loves me and cant live without me. People do crazy things in separations. Its the biggest deal imaginable to that baby. Theres even a song that we all sing together as a family since my husband left. I do everything my mother does yet apparently I dont love her enough!! A massage, a warm bath, movie night with your partner: a little downtime goes a long way. I rush home to see her and she cries/moans when she sees me I hold my hands out to her and she clings to whoever she is with at the time. Skin contact is great for bonding. 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Three of you in her bed for a little downtime goes a long way of struggles... First four months to help me out around for the smallest incident that! Mother and just wants my parents she wants nothing to her its my! First grand child but at times i feel there are a few from. Been 37 years and we are not close used to be a bit of a hermit sometimes grandma more 2. Her out of her during the afternoon so i could study 9 months and she has somehow attached herself my...

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